Trust the Process
I catch myself using some of the same phrases, or different versions of the same message, regularly with clients. Things like:
“Let’s start with the low-hanging fruit.” (Don’t tackle the biggest pain points or most sentimental projects first.")
“SOMEONE is gonna love this!” (It just may no longer be you.)
“Let’s downsize to uplevel.” (My new tagline.)
“It took __ years to create this space, so you’re not going to overhaul it all in one session, or day, or week.” (Akin to “Rome wasn’t built in a day.”)
My personal favorite, based on the frequency with which I use it, is “Trust the process.”
I say this to myself a lot, whether in regard to organizing my own space, managing my emotions, facing fears, trying something new, or motivating myself to tackle a project of any sort.
This is what trusting the process can feel like at times.
I said it regularly while helping my sister downsize a couple years ago, and she hated it. I get it. Who wants their younger sibling to tell you to trust the process in the midst of an emotionally charged time--during a house sale, break up, international move, and massive transition on multiple levels when the world as you know it feels like the Tower card in a tarot deck swaying above tectonic shifts?
I still said it. And I meant it every time. With love and conviction and a knowing that develops over years of repetition and results.
This is not simply a passive acceptance of what is happening and what is to come, although that is one ingredient. Trusting the process involves myriad layers that manifest in different ways, as no two projects are identical.
Here are a few that generally apply:
Start with a general approach (like Julie Morgenstern’s SPACE acronym)
Chunk down into sections until each one looks and feels manageable—overwhelm can cause you to stop before you’ve even started
Go through one item or section at a time, making decisions about each one as you go
Take breaks to recalibrate
Rely on friends, family, or your downsizing doula for support, encouragement, accountability, and a reset to keep moving forward
Move at a pace that your nervous system can handle, while challenging your comfort zone
Leave some space (yes, you are seeing a theme) for magic
It may seem counterintuitive, but that last one is essential because it reminds even the most prepared and methodical organizer that we don’t have all of the answers going into any project. Remaining open, adaptable, and willing to pivot mid-session helps maximize the overall success of the process and final result. Downsizing, like people and our emotions, is an ever-evolving phenomenon and changes from moment to moment.
Trusting the process requires us to believe—in the invisible, our own abilities, determination to keep going even when the final outcome remains unclear, and a little magic—that we will reach the other side of whatever adventure we embarked on. And that we will be wiser, stronger, more connected, and better organized than we were before starting.
The more I lean into my work as a downsizing doula, the more resolute I am in trusting the process, even (especially?) in my own life and home. It has yet to leave a project incomplete, a relationship worse off, a space less organized, or a client less confident or less happy in their life. It has done wonders for my closet and my marriage.
Now, more than two years later, after the most recent move, my sister and I use this expression with each other—sometimes in earnest, occasionally for laughs, often as a sister shorthand throwback to an emotionally charged time that we navigated together, and always with love. We apply it to every facet of life, and are both better off for it.
Even if you disagree or feel skeptical, I know that “SOMEONE is gonna love it.”
-The Downsizing Doula
Downsize to Uplevel
